Greeting from the Blotters Blog Horrorscope.
May you have a week of affluence that is copiously full of opulence!
Please remember that this is all in good fun.
Pisces
February 20 - March 20
Oh what heart wrenching luck! For Pisces your day is going to be less then fetch.
Todays light will be one that is bountiful like the fall will bring about the fortune of harvests.
Time to start planning a garden for fun because according to yesterdays moon it will be
invisible like the kitten that is hiding oh so well in a shoe!
Your night will be devoured by mice.
Be aware! Your lucky numbers are said to be
20, 5, 7, 10, 6, 11, 15
A quote for your week. “I declare after all there is no enjoyment like reading! How much sooner one tires of any thing than of a book! -- When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I have not an excellent library.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
Aries
March 21 - April 20
You are going to have a rainy with a chance of unicorns day!
So you better batten down the hatches and look for cover Aries!
Todays light will be one that is bad like the decisions you have made.
Yesterdays moon was full of gas. Better luck next time!
Your night will be doubled like a shot of espresso your friend just
kicked back like it was water.
Better keep an eye out on the counter tonight!
Your lucky numbers are said to be 18, 17, 19, 11, 15, 7, 9
A quote for your week. “You either choose this method of passing the evening because you are in each other's confidence, and have secret affairs to discuss, or because you are conscious that your figures appear to the greatest advantage in walking;— if the first, I should be completely in your way, and if the second, I can admire you much better as I sit by the fire.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
Taurus
April 21 - May 21
Congratulations Taurus! Your day is like it is going to be cursing the elders?
Well, things can't get possibly worse, right?
Todays light will be one that screams for the harvest.
Last nights moon was bountiful like a perfect charcuterie board how fetch is that?
Your night will be wanting.
One day your lucky numbers will win a lottery. 7, 16, 17, 11, 20, 1, 8
A quote for your week. “Honor means something different to every House, yet there are threads common to them all. It is an old concept, going back to the Second Cycle, or late in the First. The idea grew up with commerce, and borrowing, when it became important to have a reputation for reliability in paying debts. Though expanded, and now filled with elaborate ornaments and embellishments, that original use is still at its heart. And in the way of all ideas that escape their bounds and go running off into the wild, the ornaments and embellishments have come to be seen as the central point, and no House epitomized that so fully as the Lyorn. The Jhereg and the Orca, who most fully express honor in its purest sense, never use the word except ironically.”
― Steven Brust, Lyorn
Gemini
May 22 - June 21
Oh what horrifying luck! For Gemini your day is going to be less then fetch.
Todays light will be one that is shiny and sparkly.
The moon is looking like it would have been like the envy of a kitten taking a nap in the warm sunbeam if not for the flock of seagulls running away with it.
Your night will be lustful for a good nights sleep.
Your lucky numbers are said to be by the sky and the stars that soar in it.
6, 15, 18, 9, 8, 3, 10
A quote for your week. “She certainly did not hate him. No; hatred had vanished long ago, and she had almost as long been ashamed of ever feeling a dislike against him, that could be so called. The respect created by the conviction of his valuable qualities, though at first unwillingly admitted, had for some time ceased to be repugnant to her feelings; and it was now heightened into somewhat of a friendlier nature, by the testimony so highly in his favour, and bringing forward his disposition in so amiable a light, which yesterday had produced. But above all, above respect and esteem, there was a motive within her of good will which could not be overlooked. It was gratitude.--Gratitude not merely for having once loved her, but for loving her still well enough, to forgive all the petulance and acrimony of her manner in rejecting him, and all the unjust accusations accompanying her rejection. He who, she had been persuaded, would avoid her as his greatest enemy, seemed, on this accidental meeting, most eager to preserve the acquaintance, and without any indelicate display of regard, or any peculiarity of manner, where their two selves only were concerned, was soliciting the good opinion of her friends, and bent on making her known to his sister. Such a change in a man of so much pride, excited not only astonishment but gratitude--for to love, ardent love, it must be attributed; and as such its impression on her was of a sort to be encouraged, as by no means unpleasing, though it could not exactly be defined.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
Cancer
June 22 - July 22
The night is your maiden and the sun is the knife that Cancer will wield on this day of Hell because you just can't stop thinking about all the stupid things you did when you were younger!
Todays light will be one that is full of finding out.
Yesterday your moon was wanting like the desert craves the rain moon will soon bring forth that with which you seek. Be rested.
Your night will be mysterious like the school lunches in tv shows.
No more waiting with baited breath as Your lucky numbers are said to be
4, 18, 5, 12, 1, 15, 13
A quote for your week. As Cuvier could correctly describe a whole animal by the contemplation of a single bone, so the observer who has thoroughly understood one link in a series of incidents should be able to accurately state all the other ones, both before and after."
-The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
Leo
July 23 - August 22
Oh what depressing luck! For Leo your day is going to be less then fetch.
Todays light will be one that is lustful like an amine character.
Bet you weren't expecting for your lucky moon for yesterday to be invisible like the kitten that is hiding oh so well in a shoe? Lucky you!
Your night will be haunting.
Your lucky numbers are probably going to be but who is to know for sure?
2, 15, 8, 19, 13, 4, 16
A quote for your week. “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered as the rightful property of someone or other of their daughters.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
Virgo
August 23 - September 23
By the stars and their light! Virgo your day will be Bountiful like yonder waifus bosom as it bounces boobily while she runs so you too will be will spending this day cursing the gods!
Todays light will be one that is one of revenge.
Pity that yesterdays Moon was whistfull for a time when it can relax!
Your night will be waxed.
What is this? But numbers of luck!
They are said to be 15, 3, 8, 10, 18, 17, 19
A quote for your week. “No young lady can be justified in falling in love before the gentleman's love is declared, it must be very improper that a young lady should dream of a gentleman before the gentleman is first known to have dreamt of her.”
― Jane Austen
Libera
September 24- October 23
The goddess has granted Libera a day when The Swamp Hag has ditched you on your date and left you with the very large bill! We would go on but she has requested the rest to be kept a secret.
Todays light will be one that is flickering gently in the night.
Pity be what pity is, such a shame that yesterdays Moon was MOON!
Your night will be lustful.
Your lucky numbers are said to be . Better luck next time!
19, 8, 6, 20, 13, 2, 18
A quote for your week. “Pittsburgh. I'd been there. One of the most underrated cities in North America. People who'd never been there thought of it as a graveyard of abandoned steel mills, but it was a beautiful city, and it would be good to have it back.”
― Steven Brust, Lord of the Fantastic: Stories in Honor of Roger Zelazny
Ophiuchus
November 29 - December 18
Our sincere condolences Ophiuchus! Your day is going to be one hell of a day
when The Swamp Hag has blessed you! Good luck!
Todays light will be one that is twinkling gently between the branches.
Your moon is blinking at you and has taken a vacation, please check again later.
Your night will be waxed like a fresh bikini line.
Lucky numbers for you! 16, 5, 3, 4, 13, 10, 6
A quote for your week. “Categories, if you’ll excuse a brief digression, are a useful way to get a handle on things you don’t understand, as long as you don’t get too attached to them and forget that things like to pop out of one category and into another, and that sometimes the whole category turns itself inside out and becomes something different. It’s useful, for example, to categorize your target as a sorcerer, if he is one; but if you get too attached to your category it’ll leave you embarrassed when he suddenly pulls a knife on you.”
― Steven Brust, The Book of Dragon: Dragon and Issola
Scorpio
October 24 - November 22
As the sun is juggled by the clouds so to will your day that Hell falls asleep and
lets today move on by without it day.
Todays light will be one that is relaxing into the early morning.
Yesterday the moon was wanting and will soon bring forth that with which you seek.
Be full.
Your night will be famished.
Hark! Your lucky numbers scream that they are here for you!
They scream that they are 20, 12, 18, 5, 16, 2, 15
A quote for your week. “Dear Diary, Today I tried not to think about Mr. Knightly. I tried not to think about him when I discussed the menu with Cook... I tried not to think about him in the garden where I thrice plucked the petals off a daisy to acertain his feelings for Harriet. I don't think we should keep daisies in the garden, they really are a drab little flower. And I tried not to think about him when I went to bed, but something had to be done.”
― Jane Austen
Sagittarius
November 23 - December 21
By the stars and their light! Sagittarius your Foggy day is going to be one of peace and relaxation.
Todays light will be one that is waxed, smooth and silky.
The moon is looking like it would have been haunting like the 'family friendly' book of scary stories from your childhood if not for the clouds hiding it yesterday.
Your night will be wanting like the desert craves the rain.
Numbers of fortune! Numbers of Woe! Listen here before you go!
19, 12, 5, 16, 13, 2, 8
A quote for your week. “Miss Morland, no one can think more highly of the understanding of women than I do. In my opinion, nature has given them so much, that they never find it necessary to use more than half.”
― Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
Capricorn
December 22 - January 20
The goddess has granted Capricorn a day as Fearful as a new born kitten.
Spitting and hissing at the world.! Doves coo and watch over you.
Todays light will be one that is heaven like getting attention from your favorite cryptid.
Yesterday your moon had swung in on a low hanging vine and is mysterious
like the school lunches in tv shows.
Your night will be invisible like the kitten that is hiding oh so well in a shoe.
Look left! Look Right! And here arn't your lucky numbers a sight?
Your lucky numbers are said to be 4, 18, 8, 2, 9, 19, 14
A quote for your week. “She felt that she could so much more depend upon the sincerity of those who sometimes looked or said a careless or a hasty thing, than of those whose presence of mind never varied, whose tongue never slipped.”
― Jane Austen, Persuasion
Aquarius
January 21 - February 19
Such a day of Hell as everything burns to the ground around you, that Aquarius is going to have!
May the goddess have mercy on you.
Todays light will be one that is relaxing like a good shower.
Beckoning, dancing and twirling under the stars and during your moon is blinking like a it has a faulty connection lit night last night.
Your night will be spooky.
May these numbers find you lucky. 6, 7, 18, 15, 3, 13, 8
A quote for your week. “I am the happiest creature in the world. Perhaps other people have said so before, but not one with such justice. I am happier even than Jane; she only smiles, I laugh.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
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